Slices of Life, Vol. 25

Our church's annual fall hoedown takes place at a farm owned by members of the church; it's about 30 minutes south of Birmingham and is a beautiful, beautiful place. When we attended in November, Grayson took the boys far away from the campfire to a dark spot on the property where they could see hundreds of stars in the sky. Nathaniel was lucky enough to see a shooting star ...

Nathaniel: "DADDY! I saw a shooting star!"

Grayson: "You did? Did you make a wish?"

Nathaniel: "YES! I wished to get The Force." [pause] "I don't feel it yet."

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One Saturday afternoon, following a particularly tough morning with Nicholas, he threw a toy across the room and it hit me. I picked it up and carried it back to him:

Me: "Nicholas, you threw that toy and it hit me. It hurt. I'm going to show you what it felt like."

[I tapped him on the leg with the hard plastic toy.]

Nicholas: "I'm calling the police."



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The boys' cousin, Taylor, spent the night with us recently. He's 8, and he took his role as The Oldest very seriously. While trying to explain to our stubborn boys why they should just agree with him on some issue regarding General Grievous of Star Wars:

Taylor: "Look, I'm twice as old as you, Nicholas, and I'm three years older than you, Nathaniel."

Nathaniel: "Well, I think you're gonna DIE before we do, too."



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The boys love to look at the toy catalogs that come in the mail, joyfully squealing, "Mommy, I need THIS! And THIS! Oh, and I REALLY, REALLY, REEEAAALLLY need THIS!" And they're usually referring to trashy stuff like tiny animal sponges that "grow" when they get wet in the bathtub, or -- even worse -- toys with hundreds of teensy, weensy pieces that will get strewn all over the house.

So typically I throw away 90 percent of the toy catalogs that come in the mail, not even bringing them into the house. I go straight from the mailbox to the recycling can in the driveway, so they don't even see most of what lands in the mailbox to begin with. However, I'll let a "Constructive Playthings" or a "Leaps & Bounds" through the door occasionally so that they don't suspect me of filtering too much. And about once every two months, I'll bring in a Star Wars catalog, too.

Recently I came across a Star Wars catalog laying on the kitchen table, and I threw it in the recycling bin in the kitchen. Sometime later that day, the boys went foraging in the recycling bin, looking for "craft materials":

Nathaniel: [walks in the den holding the Star Wars catalog high aloft his head, like a district attorney with Exhibit A] "Mommy, how exactly did THIS end up in the recycling?"

Nicholas: [in a singsong voice] "Tell da troof!"

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One night after work as we were all getting out of the minivan, I was busily gathering up my things from the passenger seat and had my door open to get out. As I turned to get out of the car, I saw Nicholas squirming under my door to get past it and into the house, sort of low-crawling on his belly.

Me: "Nick! Could you not just wait 10 seconds until I got out of the car? Did you have to crawl under my door?"

Nathaniel: [observing, shaking his head at me] "Mommy, sometimes kids have to crawl under doors, just because they CAN."

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We lost our cat of 12 years to kidney failure in November, and Nathaniel has been vigilant in praying for her every night, making sure God doesn't forget about her. While praying for Ellie to have found peace in Heaven:

Nathaniel: "Dear Lloyd, I hope that Ellie has found a warm spot in Heaven and that she has a big box to play in. Also, I hope you're playing with a string with her. And also, I hope she's in a club. Ay-men."

Nicholas: "Dear Law-ed, please take good care of Ellie. And even though SOME PEOPLE say 'Ay-men,' I KNOW it's really 'Ah-men.' Ah-men."

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Me: "Nathaniel, you can wear a sweater today because it's going to be freezing."

Nathaniel: "WHAT??"

Me: "You can wear a ..."

Nathaniel: [interrupts] "I heard you, Mommy. When you say something and I say, 'What?', that just means 'What?' But when you say something and I say, 'WHAT??', that really means, 'I can't believe it!' "

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While playing Lego Indiana Jones on the Wii last weekend, Nicholas made a critical miscalculation and announced:

"THAT is a problem. Not a BIG problem, but it's definitely a problem."

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One morning Nicholas was playing with Jake on our bed while I got ready for work. I heard Jake sneeze twice, and then Nick exclaimed:

"Mommy, Jake just 'Bless You'd' in my hand!"

To see past Slices of Life, click here.