Uncomfortable truths, vol. 27

1. Sometimes someone sends me a picture that includes the back of my head, and I'm always like, "THAT'S what the back of my hair looked like yesterday??" As if that's not what it looks like EVERY day. One day, after I grow 6-foot-long arms, it will look better back there.

2. We've been without a TV for almost four weeks, and I've stayed up MANY weeknights past 1:30 a.m. during that month. You see, TV shows have a finite end. There’s an easy place to stop and say, “Well, that’s show’s over. Time for bed.” Unfortunately, there is no sign that pops up on the Internet that says, “The Internet ends HERE. Go to bed.” THERE SHOULD BE.

3. Would you like to know what I spent time -- actual TIME -- thinking about last night? This: Why isn't there ever a 66%, 38%, 22% or 79% chance of rain? Why is it always a round number percentage? Personally, I think they might as well just say, "It MIGHT rain tomorrow, but it might NOT." Because that's how exact of a science it seems to be.

4. I Tweeted this recently: "Whenever I hold someone else's phone, I always feel like I'm literally handling TNT. Weird phenomenon." It doesn't matter whether it's an iPhone or a Droid; if someone hands me their phone so I can see a video on it or something, I handle it like it's hot. I hold it by the edges, I gingerly press "play" or "next" or whatever, and GOD FORBID IT RINGS WHILE I'M HOLDING IT. If that happens, just go ahead and roll me into my grave.

5. Remember how I said I feel about gravel roads and driveways? That I basically have a phobia of them? I have the same phobia about double beds. Can't sleep in one, can't even bear to look at one. I cringe when I see "Queen/DOUBLE" on the packaging of sheets in a store.

Look. I get it. I'll understand why you had to unsubscribe. I'M CRAZY AS A BOX OF ROCKS.