Jake: "HEAH COMES SUPAH-MAN! HOLD ONTO YOUR LAMPS, PEOPLE!"
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
After 30 minutes sitting by Nick's side as he threw up in the bathroom with the stomach bug, I finally had to start taking notes on my phone. A few of the gems he dropped between bouts:
- "I feel like I'm gonna throw up, I don't want to, I don't want to. I'M ALLERGIC TO THROW UP."
- "Ohno-ohno-ohno-ohno, I'VE GOT HOT DOG IN MY NOSE. GET IT OUT. GET IT OUT."
- "You're better at this than Daddy." (Me: "Better at what?") "Helping me throw up."
- "I don't like my life when I throw up."
- "First I feel bad, then I toot, then I throw up. That's the life cycle of throwin' up."
- "What's the whole point of dancing, anyway?"
- "I hate when I throw up twice within 50 days."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
While eating at a Chinese restaurant, Nick was excited to get the fortune cookies at the end of the meal, although he prefaced opening his with this statement:
"Sometimes the fortune in the cookie isn't really a fortune ... it's just like, WHO CARES?"
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
I was watching a show on Bravo recently when Jake wandered down around 10:00 for his nightly last-hug-and-kiss with Amelia. If you don't watch much on Bravo, you need to know that they are a little more liberal with cursing ... they don't bleep all the bad words like the non-cable networks do. As he walked in:
TV character: "She's such a bitch. And she's also stupid."
Jake: [freezes in his tracks] "MOMMY. We don't say that. That's a bad word."
Me: "I know, buddy. That person was wrong to say that."
Jake: "WE DON'T SAY 'STUPID'."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
While riding in the car:
Nick: "I didn't know my Granny, or my great-grandmommy or great-granddaddy. Will I see them in heaven?"
Me: "Yes, if people believed in Jesus, you'll see them there."
Nick: "What else will be in heaven? Will there be other things I like there?"
Me: "Yes, all the people you love who know Jesus and all the things you like will be there. It will be a glorious place."
Nick: "Will there be ice cream, in the form of a buffet?"
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
After seeing my summery new toenail polish (bright green), Jake asked me to paint his the same color:
Me: "I'd be happy to!"
Jake: "But wait. Will it make my toenails taste bad?"
Me: "Uh ... yes. But toenails ALWAYS taste bad."
Jake: "Not mine. Sometimes, like when I just get out of the bathtub, they taste TASTY!"
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
During karate class, the sensei always asks the kids cultural questions about Japan, as well as Japanese vocabulary, which they are required to learn as part of their training.
Sensei: "Nicholas, what is the official name of the Japanese flag?"
Nick: "The red dot."
[Actual answer: "Nisshoki," or "Circle of the Sun" in English. So, you know, he was close.]
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
After karate that same night, we were sending Nick and Nathaniel up to take their showers, and Jake was desperate to take a bath, too. But it was already after bedtime, so we told him he couldn't.
Jake: "But I want to take a bath!"
Me: "Jake, it's already after 8:00, honey. We need to just get your PJs on and for you to go to bed."
Jake: "BUT I WANT A BATH. I REALLY, REALLY WANT TO TAKE A BATH."
Me: "It's too late, buddy. Not tonight."
Jake: "But can I take one this WEEK?"
Me: "Yes, of course you'll get one this week. Just not tonight. Maybe tomorrow night."
Jake: "GOOD. FINALLY!"
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Nathaniel and Nick were discussing the fact that they were finally in their last week of school:
Nick: "I can't BELIEVE I survived first grade."
Nathaniel: "Why?"
Nick: "Because, I mean, it's so much like Survivor."
Me: "How was first grade like Survivor, exactly?"
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