Aug 17, 2012

Uncomfortable truths, vol. 34

** UPDATED **
  1. I always feel a little relieved when I hear about an accident on the highway at an exit just South of where I’m getting on to go North to work. That means my traffic will be a lot lighter.*
  2. One time a gas station bathroom door didn’t lock when I locked it, but I didn’t know it. So a woman walked in on me while I was in the middle of my business. Which would have embarrassed me hardly at all if I’d been going #1. It was July 2001. I will never forget it.
  3. Blogger puts two spaces after the colon when it Tweets out the fact that I've published a new post. That means I have an extra seizure every day when that extra space comes across my Twitter feed.
  4. I wish emoticons had never been invented. I spend more time typing one, then erasing it, then typing a different one, then opting to go without, than I sometimes spend typing the entire preceding email.
  5. When I went to the restroom after The Bourne Legacy last weekend, my nest failed. If you're new here, that means that the two layers of TP that I laid on the toilet to protect my nether-regions from The Dangers That Awaited Me There absorbed some rogue urine from underneath the seat, sending me into apoplectic shock as I felt the cold, disgusting wetness of someone else's pee hit my butt cheeks. Aaaaaaaand, I just got upset about it all over again.

* It seems like with the new Disqus commenting system, sometimes comments posted using a Blogger ID don't show up on the blog. I get an email telling me about the comment, but then I never see it on the blog. Someone commented that way early this morning on the first Uncomfortable Truth in this list, chiding me for being relieved about a car accident, saying that it could be me or my family in that car one day. 

That's true, and I don't mean to make light of anyone else's tragedy. However, I was referring to a little fender-bender, not a helicopter-evacuation, jaws-of-life type of thing. Furthermore, there's a reason I title these posts "Uncomfortable Truths," not "Happy Thoughts." They are things I'm uncomfortable sharing, usually for good reason.

I just didn't want people to think I'm deleting comments or something ... if that one didn't show up, it's not because I was ashamed to leave it there. And I will continue to share my Uncomfortable Truths with you, even though sometimes it's DISTINCTLY UNCOMFORTABLE for me to do so.  :)
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