Uncomfortable truths, vol. 39

1. Every morning when I drop the boys off in the carpool line, I experience something I can only describe as "Carpool Anxiety." I've been doing it for five years, and I still worry that I'm not doing it right. Driving too slowly? Too quickly? Is that fifth-grade Safety Patroller going to report me for opening the door before I came to a complete stop? Did I misinterpret the crossing guard's hand signals?

2. I need my ignition and cup holders to be illuminated because I'm so night blind I can't find them in the dark.

3. I was driving home one of the first nights there was a chill in the air and turned the defroster on to clear my windshield. After driving a couple of miles, it only seemed to be getting worse. I turned the fan up even higher. After another few blocks, my visibility was almost zero. In frustration, I finally pulled over on a side street and swiped my fingers across the glass. Huh. The fogginess and condensation were on the OUTSIDE surface of the windshield, so the wipers cleared it right up.

4. This showed up in my Twitter feed last week:

Wait. Does Google really work right if you don't use proper capitalization, punctuation and spelling?

5. Every time I blow my nose into a tissue, I peel it back open and peek into it. I will not believe you if you say you don't do that, too. COME. ON.