Amelia in video

I'm in Houston this week on business, but I wanted to share a few recent videos with you. They're not of anything really special ... just some random things, but I knew my family would want to see them. And since some of you consider yourselves an extension of my family (AHEM, I'm talking to you, STALKERS), I thought you might enjoy them, too.

And yes, we all talk to her in that ridiculously high tone of voice. It's a sickness.


First, I caught Amelia "sanitizing her hands." She sees her teachers do it all day long, I'm sure, and we do it after we change her diaper around here. To see her miming it was just adorable! (And the carpet spray was in the "lock" position, so she couldn't have sprayed it even if she'd tried.)



Next, even though Amelia isn't walking quite yet, she IS a master at getting up and down the stairs quickly.



And finally, we waited months and months too long for this to have been funny when we finally did it, but we gave Amelia a lemon to taste last weekend. Actually, I still thought it was funny.

I went to a LEGO BrickFair

** This is not a sponsored post. I paid our way in and bought a whole bunch of Legos we don't need while we were there. **

Have you ever attended a Lego BrickFair?

Last Saturday and Sunday, BrickFair came to Birmingham, and I took Nathaniel, Nick and Jake down to experience it. I have to admit, it was pretty amazing.

The detail work on the creations was mind-blowing, and hardly anything there was built from kits. Almost everything was designed by the builders themselves, who ranged in age from 8 to probably 78.

Each builder sat with his or her creation all day and answered questions about them ... I was surprised by how many questions the boys asked. They weren't very shy!

We saw a lot of cityscapes, and LOTS of trains, which were powered by electricity.

I only had my phone with me, so I couldn't get great pictures, but I thought this city park was really cute. There was even a couple getting married there at the bottom left corner!

One of the most impressive ones was a Star Wars ship that was built in layers so you could see the inside of the ship. It must have been six feet long and two-and-a-half feet wide at its widest point ... I think the builder said that it contained $3,000 worth of Legos.

My PERSONAL favorite was this beachside RV park scene featuring surf equipment, a picnic area, a playground and a swimming pool!

I'm telling you, I nearly fainted over that swimming pool. I thought it was the cutest Lego thing ever.

But not far from the RV park, we came upon the Military section, and then I had a new favorite: the Vietnam creation.

It had two working helicopters ... the rotors are blurry because they were spinning, and there were so many tiny details, down to a monkey high in a treetop.

And if you were paying close attention, you'd see that it was built as a cutaway model, so you could see into the underground bunker or whatever that's called. I was fascinated.

The boys just couldn't get enough ... they didn't want to stop looking at models -- unless it was to shop. And I did spend about $20 on each of them, because they were SO inspired by what they saw, they couldn't wait to get home and build some new things of their own.

One area of the floor was sectioned off for building, so even though it was GERM CENTRAL in there, I let them hunker down at a table to play.

They got down to business quickly and built steadily for about 45 minutes.

Finally, when I decided that they'd spent enough time at the petri dish table, I announced that it was time to head out.

Of course as we walked out, we had to stop and admire some of the creations that had had longer lines when we first arrived.

Jake just LOVED the ones that included trains that whizzed by every minute or so.

If you have a Lego Lover in your house and BrickFair comes anywhere near you, I'd highly recommend that you go.

I'm quite sure I won't be able to avoid it now that the boys know about it ... they'll want to go back annually.

And that's fine ... I probably had almost as much fun as they did. ALMOST.

It was a good day.

A really, really good day.

Prince Charming

The other night after I got out of the shower and put on my PJs, I was walking downstairs when Jake called out to me from his bed.

Jake: "Mommy! Come heah!"

Me:  [walking into his room]  "What do you need, buddy?"

Jake: "Will you covah me up?"

Me: "Sure. Here you go."

Jake: "I like it when you look like this, Mommy. You look soooooooo good."

Me:  [chuckling]  "You mean with my hair in a ponytail and my glasses on?"

Jake: "Yes! And with your PJ shuht on. You look SO CUTE!"

Me: "Jakey, you're going to make a great husband one day."

For the children

This is the most important thing I saw this week on the Internet, so I wanted to share it with you, too.

What an awesome, sometimes intimidating responsibility we have! But I'm so glad to have it.

Internet roundup

Today I am thrilled to say that I'm beginning my weekend of scrapbooking with some of my closest friends at our Winter Scrapbooking Retreat. But I couldn't just leave you hanging, so although I didn't have time to write anything witty of my own, here are a few of my favorites from over the past week -- as well as a few I found that I'd bookmarked all the way back last Summer. (**Language warning on a few of them.**)

Enjoy, and have a great weekend!
 

Via Win:



 
Via Damn You Auto Correct:

Via Damn Funny Texts:

And all the rest are via Fail Blog, one of my sources for the most consistently funny stuff on the Internet:

 

Slices of Life, Vol. 44

While we were sitting around the other night, and completely apropos of nothing:

Nick: "Well, we're having crispitos at school tomorrow for lunch, so you'd better get ready for some stinky toots tomorrow night. Happens every time we have crispitos."

 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Nathaniel was typing a short story on his laptop for a homework assignment, periodically pausing to ask me how to spell words.

Nathaniel: "How do you spell 'properly'?"

Me: "P-r-o-p-e-r-l-y."

Nathaniel: "No, not 'properly,' 'PROBERLY'."

Me: "Use it in a sentence."

Nathaniel: "If you take my laptop, I will PROBERLY hit you."

Me: "Oh, yes. P-r-o-b-a-b-l-y."

Nathaniel: "Yeah, that's it." 

  

  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Recently we were talking during supper and Grayson said something to Nick, then:

Nick: "HEY, I said those exact same words earlier today! Like, those EXACT. SAME. WORDS."

Grayson: "Well, I must be clairvoyant, then."

Nick: "What does 'clairvoyant' mean?"

Grayson: "It means I can read your mind."

Nick: "OH YEAH? WELL I'M A SIDEKICK. I CAN READ MINDS TOO." 

    

  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The other day I was preparing lunch for the boys, and Jake asked me to slice an apple for him.

Me: "Do you want me to peel it, or do you want me to leave the peel on?"

Jake: "Peel it. I only like the banana part."

 

  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Nick and Nathaniel have become quite the little "gamers" since they discovered Minecraft earlier this year. One recent Saturday I took them to a birthday party and then to the park to play:

Nick: "Everyone on Minecraft's gonna be wondering where I am! I've been A-F-K-ing for like three hours."

Me: "A-F-K-ing? What's that?"

Nick: "Away from the keyboard, MOMMY."

  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Just before Christmas, Jake was asking about Santa bringing the gifts if we were going to be in South Carolina for the holidays. I think I've mentioned before that we don't do Santa (or, we haven't with the older kids, anyway).

Me: "Well, Jake, it won't be a problem ... you'll get all your gifts. Remember? Daddy and I buy all the gifts, so we'll just take them with us."

Nathaniel: "Aww, are you gonna ruin it for HIM, too?"

(So at that moment, I became aware that Nathaniel and Nick want Jake and Amelia to believe in Santa. I think it's kind of cute, but I have no idea how we'll approach it next year.)

  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Nick was eating a treat after supper recently, and he'd chosen some gummy bears out of his treat basket.

Nick: "Mommy, what are gummy bears made of?"

Me: "I don't know. I guess maybe gelatin? And sugar? And a few other ingredients. Take a look on the side of the box and see what it says."

Nick: [chewing]  "Yeah, it says 'gelatin.' What's in gelatin?"

Me: "Mmm, horse lips, I think."

Nick: [spitting and sputtering]  "That's DISGUSTING! HORSE LIPS?! In GUMMY BEARS?!"  [spits all the gummy bears out and starts scraping his tongue with his fingernails]

Me: "Well, probably not. I have no idea, really. But I was getting you back for making me explain what an 'anus' is to you this morning."

Me: [to Grayson]  "See? This is what being a mother of three boys has reduced me to. Anuses and horse lips."

  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Nick has picked up some bad words from a friend recently, and I'm not pleased about it. It's actually a combination of a particular friend and the Chat feature in Minecraft, but that's another story. Anyway, he's seen a particular word in print, but had never heard it out loud, and he decided to whip it out the other night while we were on the way home from school. We were driving behind a huge pickup truck that swung suddenly, with no warning, into a driveway.

Me: "A blinker would have been nice, dude."

Nick: "YEAH, DUMB-BISS."

  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

You may recall that Nick LOVES to shake his booty around the house. Always has. Runs around singing and wagging that thing at us all the time, which cracks us up. Anyway, Nick and Nathaniel love the new Justin Bieber/Nicki Minaj song Beauty and the Beat:

Nathaniel: "Mommy. Will you download that new song we like, the one we were singing on the way home?"

Me: "Which one? The Justin Bieber song?"

Nick: "No, I don't think it's Justin Bieber. It's that one that goes, 'Allllllll I need, is a booty and a beat' ..."

[And that really IS all that child needs.] 

 

Things people say ... vol. 9

Oh, it makes me kind of nervous to write one of these posts when I think there might be some new people lurking around here. But when it comes down to it, I just have to do what I do.

So, if you're new, a few times a year, I get a bee in my bonnet to note a few things I've heard people say or seen people write that have driven me absolutely up a wall. As in, if there had been a wall in my immediate vicinity, I would LIT-TRELLY* have climbed right up it.

I do not name names, and it is not meant to be mean-spirited. And also in addition furthermore, I do not make it a regular practice to post a bunch of disclaimers before I get around to a post ... but I've had several comments from first-time commenters lately, and that makes me a little nervous.

ANYWAY.


1. "Far-rid" instead of "for-hehd." Nope. It's spelled the way it's supposed to be pronounced. Not sure how anyone can argue with this one, but then again, people insist on saying "arnj," too, which CLEARLY isn't how you should pronounce something spelled o-r-a-n-g-e.

2. "Assessories."  *sigh*  Pronouncing "accessories" as "assessories" makes an a** out of you and you. I watch some fashion-related reality shows, and unfortunately a whole bunch of "experts" on those shows mispronounce the word. Loss of times. In essry episode.

3. "As per usual." Well, HERE'S a break from tradition for you. This one isn't technically incorrect ... it just grates on my nerves anyway. It drives me nuts because it's redundant, with the "as" and the "per" both being part of the phrase. In my opinion, one should say "as usual" or "per usual," just to be more succinct. (And either of my suggestions are also judged correct, but "as per usual" is still recognized as acceptable, as well. Bummer.)

4. "Entitled vs. titled." THIS IS A BIGGIE. I mean, I hear and see this one at least once a week. Books and movies are titled. People are entitled to things. A book is not entitled The Grapes of Wrath. A movie is not entitled Anchorman. They are TITLED those things. My friend is entitled to collect $5,000 because she won a contest at work. A child believes he is entitled to dessert after every meal. My cat believes he is entitled to poop on the floor for ... SOME UNKNOWN REASON.

5. "You really wet my appetite." I have no words for this one. I read this sometime within the last week, and it nearly pushed me over the edge. I can't remember where I saw it, but all it WHETTED my appetite for was a washcloth to give myself a nice, long bath so I'd feel clean again. BLECH.


* LIT-TRELLY would totally be on the list, except that it hails from Parks & Rec, and nothing bad comes out of Parks & Rec. So, LIT-TRELLY gets a pass.

Snow day! Well, snow half-hour, after which everyone got cold and bored.

I'm pretty sure you all heard that Alabama got some snow last week.

Wasn't much, compared to what many of you get all winter long, I know.

But we only get one or two inches once every two or three years, so it was a BIG. FREAKING. DEAL. around here. And Someone didn't like being left inside to watch from behind glass. Like a zoo animal.

She wasn't quite sure what to make of all the white stuff, and didn't know why the boys were throwing it at each other, but she really wanted to be a part of it.

The big boys are old enough to remember the last time we had snow, and they were disappointed with how long it took me to get home from work so they could come home and play in it.

IT'S A SHAME I WAS BUSY TRYING TO KEEP MYSELF ALIVE WHILE DRIVING WITH THOUSANDS OF "CHALLENGED" ALABAMA DRIVERS WHO CAN'T DRIVE IN SNOW. So it took me almost two hours to make it the 11 miles from my office to their school.

So even though it was 5:00 when we got home, we still had time to play.

I would like to point out that while my children THINK that they will play in the snow for seven to eight hours, they have never made it more than 45 minutes.

Everything starts off great, and everyone's happy.

Then people get bored and start throwing snowballs at their sister for fun.

She is intrigued, but it only makes her want to come outside even more.

Anyway, as I was saying, it's all smiles at first, everything's good.

Snowballs are thrown, and nobody's good and wet yet.

A few balls hit toboggans, but nobody's cold, no snow has gone down pants or shirts yet.

We're all smiles.

And then.

AND THEN. Someone makes a particularly on-point throw ...

and someone else gets NAILED.

And downhill the afternoon goes.

And poor sister behind the glass gets upset because she sees her brother upset ...

... and we decide it's not fair to keep her inside any longer.

So she gets to come outside and hang out with the big kids.

Please note how we took the time to bundle her up in layers AND SOCKS AND SHOES.

What's that thing they say about Arizona? "It's a dry heat"? We're the opposite here. It's a warm cold. Or something. Don't worry. She was fine.

Even though Grayson originally wasn't going to "get involved," ultimately he couldn't stay away.

Jake was so excited because I think he thought Daddy was going to be on his side.

Grayson's not really a "team player."

He's always been more of an "every man for himself" kind of guy.

But all's fair in love and snow, I suppose.

Poor Jakey. It's hard to learn these lessons.

Still, even with some tears, much fun was had in the, oh, 40 minutes or so we spent in the snow before everyone got so wet and cold that they were miserable.

Spirits were generally high until the end.

And as bad as the weather had been earlier in the day,

as grey as the skies were that brought the snowstorm into Birmingham,

the evening ended in beautiful, clear skies, a cotton-candy sunset, and a bright moon to light our path back to the door.